Guest blog by Jaimelyn Gray

Opening night!! Yay! We are finally here! I am so excited I could almost…

Bleed all over the place? Surely this must be a joke. Or, no wait a minute. That's right. I forgot for one second that the universe hates me. Because certainly everyone knows that nothing goes better with opening a show than good old fashioned cramps. Greaaaaaat timing.

Oh, I know, some of you are completely horrified. And if so, I would strongly advise avoiding this blog all together because yes, I am seriously going to openly talk about my time of month on a public forum. You bet your sweet whistlin' dixie. And here's why: half the population knows firsthand what a pain in the ass a woman's monthly cycle is under normal circumstances. And the other half is a witness and bystander. So think of what we women go through 12 times a year (with some exeptions) and now add on top of that all the stress of opening a show. Recipe for Disaster. Tensions inevitably run high - competing egos, exhaustion, and sexual tension can all enter into the mix. But load on the hormones and a person may not just ACT like they want to scratch your eyes out, they may actually do it!

Of course, you may be thinking at this point: TOO. MUCH. INFORMATION. To which the feminist side of me says, "Oh, poo. It's only nature for the love of God." And really, with raging hormones, and the pain of someone kicking you in the uterus, all a woman really wants is a little sympathy. When you come and see The Wedding you'll understand why. I stand on a chair, sit split legged on a chair, lay on my back with my feet in the air, and kick my legs in the air while being held by the Groom. All while wearing a nice short skirt. Don't you think there is some cause for concern here? I mean, talking about this issue is one thing, but actually SHOWING it to the world is every woman's worst nightmare. The remnants of my teenage soul is freaking out right now. I had nightmares last night of being naked on stage and even THAT seems like a better options at this point. But only if it's next weekend. 

I am already getting my ass kicked this morning by the exhaustion that comes with the crimson tide. And let's not forget that The Wedding is an hour and ten minute marathon. By the time the show is over, I wouldn't be surprised if my husband Leszek has to scrape me off the floor and carry me to the car.

Oh. That's right. Tomorrow is our first anniversary. What a spoiler.

-Jaimelyn Gray